When it comes to personal growth, you’re usually hardest on yourself.
How often do you jump straight to the thing that you got wrong instead of taking a moment to focus on all the things that you got right?
Probably too often.
Failing to take the time to build yourself up in regards to the stuff that you have achieved focuses your attention on all of the things that have gone wrong instead. This isn’t good for your morale or confidence.
The To-Do List
We’ve all got to-do lists. But have you ever actually completed one? You’ll most likely find that it’s never-ending and as soon as you achieve one thing, another three get added.
Ever added in tasks that you’ve done, a task that wasn’t originally on the list, just so that you can tick it off and feel better?
With that in mind, why not create your done-it list?
You’re A Proven Success Story
Once you start to list all the things that you’ve achieved as far back as you can remember, you’ll soon see how much of a success story you actually are.
Success leads to more success and it, in turn, increases confidence.
We can all spend too much time focusing on the things that we’ve got wrong, where we’ve made mistakes. But it’s a complete waste of energy.
Focus instead on building on things that you’re good at.
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The 4 R’s
It’s time to start leveling up and celebrating the wins instead of dwelling on the losses.
Here’s a super simple, 4 step process that you can use to quickly improve without being hard on yourself.
1
Reflect
Take some time to sit back, chill out and look at the thing from a distance. Go for a walk or take a day off – whatever it takes for you to be able to take a good look at what’s happened at a distance. You need time to reflect before you can make changes.
2
Review
You should be aiming for a proactive review. Often when reviewing it’s easy to jump straight to the stuff you got wrong. Make your review process different. The first thing you should review is a list of LBs, your ‘like bests.’ What did you like best about what you did? Make a list of them because you’ll want to do them again. Reinforce positive behaviors and once you’ve exhausted your like-best list, you can move to the next part.
3
Refinement
This is a list of NTs, your ‘next times.’ What would you do next time? Write out a list of all the things that you would do again if faced with the same process.
4
Reschedule
When are you going to try this again? The one thing that you’re in complete control of here is your next play. You can’t change what’s already happened, but you most definitely can change how you will do it next time.
Self-Development
You’ll notice that all these steps focus on the positives. There is no real attention given to things that you might have done wrong. The focus is all on the things you liked best and the things that you want to do next time.
You will create a continuous journey of positive self-development.
It’s time to bring with you the wisdom of what you’ve learned in the past to move forwards in the future.
