Exactly What to Say is a means of delivering sales training skills to people who don’t see themselves as salespeople.
Most people don’t want to be viewed as a stereotypical salesperson, but selling is essential to run a successful business. This juxtaposition can be confusing!
Using the EWTS methodology will help you effortlessly engage in difficult conversations, disguising sales skills in a more palatable way.
But for these skills to work at their best, you need to practice them to ensure that you have more intentionality around your sales language choice.
To Influence or To Manipulate?
The difference between influence and manipulation is integrity.
It’s about doing something for someone, not doing something to them.
For example, if you’re selling real estate with integrity, then you should be helping somebody make the right decision for them about their next chapter.
To influence with integrity is to help people see a version of themselves that they hadn’t seen. They should choose to step towards it.
Everyone a real estate agent deals with is likely moving because they’re experiencing a significant life event, such as a new child, a new job, a divorce, or becoming an empty nester. They could be a first-time buyer, an upscaler, or a downsizer. The best way to approach this is to show up in this life event and become part of it rather than selling into it.
This secret ingredient is empathy - you need to care about what the people you care about care about.
To understand what the people you care about, care about, you will need an insight into their motivation.
How To Influence
People will only choose to act because it suits their reasons. No one will move because you told them to, and there tend to be only three reasons why they move.
One is to run towards something, two is to run away from something, and three is to light them up inside or make their heart sing.
If these are the only three reasons, don’t make the common mistake of pulling only one of those levers when trying to influence people.
But how do you understand another person’s reasons? It’s super simple, you just need to ask.
You won’t be able to advise, guide, or be of any help unless you understand the problem or the opportunity, and curiosity is key to that.
Your goal is to understand somebody else’s context before you insert your content. Your advice will only be valuable when it is contextualized.
Something that you might view as valuable is only worth it if the receiver deems it as that. Pushing an unwelcome agenda is what gives sales a bad rep, no matter how much charisma you exude, if your prospect doesn’t want or need it, you will repel them.
Build your business relationship on good listening, understanding, and true empathy.
How To Reconnect
Business transactional relationships don’t always last forever, but customers are customers for a reason and can become customers again.
But how often do you reconnect with your previous clients? It’s good practice and makes sound business sense, but certain tactics and phrases should be avoided at all costs.
When reconnecting and starting a new conversation, avoid the dreaded ‘justing’.
- I’m just circling back.
- I’m just checking in.
- I’m just trying to touch base.
All are inappropriate because the word ‘just’ is forcing permission, a permission that you don’t have to start this conversation.
There are better ways of engaging, and all you have to do is readjust your script and use the OFQ framework.
Opening Fact Questions
OFQs are perfect conversation starters. They use a polite opening, a mutually agreeable fact and an easy-to-answer question structure.
A mutually agreeable fact is something that you both know is true, something that cannot be doubted.
For example, you might say: ‘I sold you your home 13 months ago, there have been plenty of changes both locally and nationally in the real estate market’
These are reasonable, mutually agreeable facts that earn permission to start a conversation.
The next thing to do is ask an easy-to-answer question, such as: are you folks still living in the house?
OFQs are incredibly versatile and can be used during your more difficult conversations too.
This simple framework can be used to tactfully ask for a raise or even to respectfully terminate employment. They work so effortlessly because OFQs are the easiest way to start a conversation with permission. They create an opportunity for the bigger conversation you want to have.
This framework will set you up easily to have a conversation and although they sound simple, OFQs only work well if you practice them. Over time you could have an entire store of polite OFQs readily available for your Critical Conversations.
Seize Control By Asking Questions
No one ever enjoys having difficult conversations, but following the EWTS methodology makes having them considerably easier.
By slowing the process down, you will speed up the outcome, and one way to guarantee this is to ask better questions.
Intentional questions are tools that you can utilize to talk differently to both yourself and those around you – and it couldn’t be easier with EWTS.
You can take every sequence of words in the Exactly What to Say book and apply it to times that you engage in difficult conversations to converse effortlessly in the future.
